Mar
08
2004
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Someone To Hold

*rubs her eyes awake* I am awake!! Quick run down of the weekend. I stayed over at Mandarin’s house and went to Church with Scott. I know there were fifteen billion other intricacies, but this is what happens when I don’t get to blog my immediate impressions. *sighs*

I met another couple of new friends of Scott’s. One married couple, and one not married girl. *rolls her eyes at herself* Another bad flaw of mine, immediate Jealousy. Blah. If it isn’t because all of these wonderful people got to know and grow up with Scott– it’s for other reasons. I’m not really willing to shed light on. It’s not hard to pop me back out of Jealous mode though, especially not with Scott. No Siree. I just look him in the eyes and think to myself “You’re gonna marry him. And you love him SOOOO much. He loves you too. Remember?” and then I do. Then I’m alright.

We played a few games. I seem to have caught a permanent chill though *is currently shaking like a leaf* which could be bad.I liked the games, and I’m sure I could get better at them over time. I’m not great at all the games I play, but normally I play. I refused double dash because they were playing in teams, and I have only played VS and so I didn’t want to screw any one up. They played Dance dance, which Scott and I sucked at together, *smiles*

The next day Scott and i went to his family’s ward. It was nice. I have to admit they all seemed much nicer than my ward. Not that my ward is bad, they just can be really aloof sometimes. After Church we went and had some lunch, which was good, because at that point i had been fasting for over 24 hours (fasting, not eating…. whatever. I swear I’m not anorexic, and if you could see me, you’d know that it was true.) so I was feeling pretty ill. I considered asking Scott to take me home early from Church, but after our first meeting he reminded me that we needed to go visit Shelly and Ty. So I was alright. I just sorta… ignored my body. We went and met his friends. And then we headed back out to my house, where we had a few pictures taken. Not all of them are the most flattering of me, but Scott looks pretty dang cute in all of them :) Very foxy. We went down and walked around temple Square. Sat in front of the Christus for two and a half english sessions, one spanish, and two German. I think the first German one wasn’t loud enough, so they played it again. Heh. Anyway. I love sitting there. I’ve never been inside (the actual inside, waiting rooms don’t really count) the Salt Lake Temple, and only in the Jordan River Temple once. But the Christus is one of my favorite places to go. I hadn’t been in so long. *sighs*

we came back and watched A Walk to Remember and had additional commentary from Dax. I couldn’t really kick him out of the common space basement, especially since he was there first, and he was doing homework. So I just tried to deal with it. Like Scott says, we had a tickle fight, but I lost, just like he says. I blame it on poor muscle tone and small hands on my part. *nods, then shifty eyes* And maybe I wanted to lose, that’s up to you to figure out. 😀

Anyway, i have schoolage, and what not. I’m exhausted from the weekend, so I’m going to go catch up on a few more z’s. :)

Derringer Meryl [Not So lonely Nights] Out

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Mar
01
2004
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You wouldn’t stay here patiently within your heart

Ohum, wow. Can I say wow? I had a spectacular time. We played games and watched movies, and it was great. *is speachless* I’m sorry, I’m just… Wow. It was a great day. We watched Star Wars Episode Two, and mocked the bad choice of Anakin, and the ever so stupidly written love themes (They seemed really forced to me.) and then we watched Orange County. Which i didn’t expect to be that good, but it was. (BTW, if my typing is off, it’s because my eyes are super sensitive to the light right now because of my contacts, and i’m trying to avoid looking at the screen.) The movies were great, But i really enjoyed holding Scott’s hand, and leaning on his shoulder. Being cuddly is possibly my most favorite thing ever. :) I think I like it best when i’m cuddly with Scott. :”) I looked at our hands tonight, just sorta watched them at a moment that was rather dull during the movie (probably an Anakin moment) and thought to myself– I wouldn’t mind doing this forever. (Shuts up at the risk of freaking ‘people’ out)

Scott’s siblings were funny, and a joy to talk to. Of course they had to drag out the Pictures of him in school and what not. I thought they were cute, but the sibs claimed them “dorky” I guess i’m just into the geek chic thing. :) it was fun to see Scott interact with them. 😉 Much nicer to them than my oldest brother was to me.

I felt sorta bad, i didn’t eat all of my cake. But then again, I do have that little quirky thing about not liking to eat in front of people. I think I did pretty well other than that. It was really nice to get to know Scott’s family. Put faces and personalities to the names. *nods*

On the ride home Scott said I had an amazing laugh. I appreciate that. I’m pretty insecure about my laugh. I feel like i laugh too loud sometimes. Usually resulting in extreme embarrassment, to either myself or the people with me. I try to keep it down, but what can I say? I love to laugh.

Anyway, I have school tomorrow. I still have to finish up some of it, so I better skedaddle off to bed so i can get up and finish it :)

Oh yeah, and If you want to know what the Title and catch line are about go here 😀 Smile, It’s one of my favorite songs. I have the single in Japanese.

Derringer Meryl [But I have an idea! I won’t give up whatever happens] Out

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Feb
29
2004
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Everything is conspiring against me…. i’m sure.

When I chose my ever so lovely outfit for today, I thought to myself “Look at the snow! It’s melting. I’m so excited. I can wear my sandles and not freeze!” I giddily picked my outfit out around this prospect, my skirt is spring-y and light.

We got hit with a snow storm. Now, With my spring-y and light skirt, i will be wearing combat boots. Stylish, and keep the snow out. *frowns* I hate snow. It’s conspiring against me to make me do stupid things today. *kicks the snow without shoes on* COLD! Ahhhhhhhh!

Right. So I”ll be looking like a dork, Royally, with my boots. Which I now officially hate. *mutters*

Derringer Meryl [mumbles] Out

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Feb
29
2004
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I really Wish It was only me and you!

If you just joined us, as in you didn’t read my three entries for saturday– I suggest you do so– :) Just for the sake of how funny I think I am, and the entries are. Heh. Anyway. Tonight, D&D.

I didn’t do much. Scott’s friends (as they so are called because I can’t say I know them well enough to create them aliases) picked me up because he had to work really late at work. (really late reads: Nine or so) and they had a hard time finding my house. Shock of a lifetime. Not really. I should make my own instructions on how to get here. If I had been thinking, I would have. Shame on me. Oh well, at least I have the fact that I’m worrying about Essays and Chapters to be read and make up homework, that’s what i’m working on. It would have been nice to get them some better instructions, but alas, there is no use sighing over the past.

I was still pretty quiet this time. IMO anyway, I still blended some, but I have to say, i’m still feeling like a bit of an outsider. Scott and I showed them some Legendary Frog Stuff, and Eight Bit Theater D&D which they seemed to enjoy. :) That was nice. I didn’t eat again. I think I have some sort of phobia about eating in front of a large group of people. I don’t know. I think it shows how comfortable I was with Scott on our first date, because I did eat on our date. *nods* I think it’s because when I’m nervous, I feel queasy (my stomach is my ‘weak link’) and so when i feel queasy, I don’t want to eat. In the long and short of it– It must just be some sort of neuroses.

I have to admit, with no offense to Scott’s Friends who drove me down, (i really appreciate it!) I enjoyed the ride back up, simply because while there was music, we could still talk to one another. I think I’ve fallen into this happy place where I like to talk (as well as listen) and it’s the place where I used to be. Before I entered the uncertainty of adolescence I was a real social butterfly. I loved to talk to people, and i knew everyone’s names. I still considered myself shy, but I really wasn’t. I wasn’t the bravest little toaster, but I was something between shy and outgoing. I moved out of state, and then back in, and adolescence hit and every conversation I tended to join had the razor sharp reply of “Who Invited You to this conversation?”

Anyway, I digress.

I’m really enjoying conversing. I get in the mood to talk, and strangely the mood to listen follows it. I’m just… so excited. I love hearing Scott’s stories about his mission and his crazy antics with his best friend. I love learning about him.

He asked me to go to his Singles Ward with him. And I really Really REALLY wanted to. So I said sure, and then I remembered that last week I had accepted the calling to help in the Primary. *sighs* So not this week. I thought about asking him to come to my ward, but he also has things to do down there. He takes a co-worker (I think, right?) to his Singles Ward with him. I figure it’s a good thing, and I really don’t want to deprive the guy of his very handsome Church going partner. It’d be selfish of me. So instead I get to go and handle the Sunbeams, and probably eat my words about being patient with kids.

Cause I’m more of the …. Relief Society Teacher type. I’m not very verbose, I’m sure the kids can understand me, but I’m not sure I can handle not having attention paid to me when I speak… *yawns* though I seemed to handle it well enough when none of the Relief Society Ladies seemed to acknowledge that I was speaking. They weren’t so good about making eye contact.

I’m still really nervous about tomorrow. For various reasons. A few things looming over my head. And the incessant fear of how i look when I eat. Maybe Spaghetti wasn’t the best choice for dinner. heh. I’m a noodle slurper. Comes from two years of Ramen Consumption.

Anyway. I need to sleep. Though I’d like to mention that my mom was in the room when we said goodnight. So sadly, I lacked a kiss. :( I understand and all. Mom told me she wished that she had waited for me in the basement– I agreed. *blushes wildly* >_< Alright I better go to sleep before my eyes fall out of my head. Goodnight all you beautiful peoples you 😉

Derringer Meryl [When you smile I melt inside] Out

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Feb
26
2004
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We can live like Jack and Sally if we want…

Things i’ve learned lately:

1. No matter what, it’s really not a good idea to try to do the Night at the Roxbury thing while skating. Really. Don’t try it, unless you like falling down. (See: What Is Love? [7″ Mix] – Haddaway)

2. Sometimes the best laid plans give way to the most memorable moments.

3. As said by someone very wise: “Why is it when your life is in danger you can only yell one or two words?” (See: IRON GATE! or possibly BIG STICK!)

4. What could be more fun than having your own inside joke? (See: Mango the Zombie and Necro-Nancy)

5. Sometimes the simplest things are the sweetest. These simple things can also cause certain people to giggle insanely for long amounts of time, and possibly grin at unexpected moments.

6. Having Tenth Kingdom Marathons are also known to make certain people grin as well.

7. I am the entertainment of my family. I am the newest soap opera– I suppose — and I love it.

8. Songs on Repeat while writing can make you smile as you remember people…. and moments.

9. Every near death experience remembered makes me appreciate everyone I know who is alive.

10. Every scary experience, say falling in love, is worth it.

I got a check in the mail today, and I’m so excited. I’m going to FINALLY get my Inuyasha with it, unless I can think of something else to do with it. I really should save it– but I want to have something to do while i’m unable to move during Spring Break (I’m getting the little lovelies removed off of my foot again. Hopefully they’ll stay away this time.) I really hope I don’t get scheduled next wednesday, but I know Guts or maybe Monkey would be willing to switch with me. 😉 I’m getting to the point where I don’t even want to go to work, cause i’d rather hang out with Scott and his friends.

(looks at her TV) huh, my DVD has a scratch or a defect. Hm.

*coughs and goes back to her previous statement* I know that might make no sense to anyone here, but i love work. I spend a lot of my time there. They are my only social outlet.

Looks like my counter broke 1700, thanks guys and gals!

Bah, I must go and cook and see when I work.

Derringer Meryl [Angel from my Nightmare] out

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