Undone

Oooo, Beginnings! I’ve got my homework done. Huzzah. I’m done feeling all oooy gooey about last night. *tosses it out the window* however i’ve come to the decision that my dad won’t CHOOSE who I marry, and for that matter neither will Wudan, or the Specialist. *leers* I don’t know if the Specialist was joking about giving monkey the rusty saw treatment, but in any case, Monkey is one of my few friends, and i’m not about to let one of my stupid siblings ruin that for me. *rolls her eyes*

I think it’s part of the human condition to feel the need to protect your loved ones from people you feel have the capability to hurt them. 🙂 It’s a nice thought guys, but shove off, you didn’t protect me from anything when i needed you to, and now, your “I’m your older brother and i need to protect you from all the bad guys in the world” act is not only bothersome, it’s over done. You care, you’ll back me up in my defiance from what some people in the house have done. Cause when it comes down to it, I’m not Wudan. I don’t plan on being LIKE Wudan. I don’t plan on being the Specialist, or Daxero, or anyone else but me. I know the rules, I know where to go, what to do, and what MY goals are. So, basically…. be supportive. I was of you. I had all the faith in the world in The Specialist and his wife. I defended their right not to go to church, if they so chose. I blatantly told my father that i did not want to discuss their worthiness to go to the temple. I didn’t want to know. I still don’t. It’s not my issue, It’s not something I Need to know. As for Wudan and His wife, well, I’m one of their greatest allies, because honestly, we aren’t winning any points by shoving religion into their gullet. *shrugs* I’m really into this whole AGENCY Thing i heard about at church. I live the way i want to. I get my blessings, and my short comings, and stuff happens. Same with everyone else. Some people aren’t ready for church or religion, and some are.

Some are just being rebellious brats. IN any case, it’s everyone’s own choice to do what they want. And so they do….

*smiles* And I do what I want to– except, it seems like even my own siblings are beating me back down. I mean, the old standard of “I’m older so I can do this, and you’re younger so you can’t.” doesn’t hold up so much anymore. Ya know? I deserve to date who I want. Wudan got to. Why not me? heck, and mine are even members of the church, they just aren’t active. I guess it’s because i’m a girl, right?

Anyway, it’s time for the lyric spew– because I want to… 🙂

In the inspired Karaoke-ness of today (Gert is having a Karaoke Party … no i wasn’t invited, but i wouldn’t have been able to go anyway.) we get a song, that would be great for Karaoke!

Falls apart Sugar Ray

She falls apart by herself

No ones there to talk or understand

Feels sustained, dries here eyes

Finds herself, opens the door inside

People see right through you

Everyone who knew you well

Falls apart, might as well

Day is long and nothing is wasteful

Runaway runaway [Rodney background:] runaway runaway

Hold, hold you but your going away

Runaway runaway [Rodney background:] runaway runaway

[Rodney: Want]

Hold (Want) you tomorrow but your leaving today

You walk along by yourself

There’s no sound, nothing is changing

Been gone away, left you there

Emptiness is nothing you can’t share

All those words that hurt you

More than you would let it show

Comes apart, by yourself

All is well and everything is wasted

Runaway runaway [Rodney background:] runaway runaway

[Rodney: Want]

Hold (Want) hold you but your going away

Runaway runaway [Rodney background:] runaway runaway

[Rodney: Want]

Hold (Want) you tomorrow but your leaving today

Sometimes we’ll feel around and this dance instead can’t be down

All the sound of me on my own

Any sound of me again it’s time away surround around a friend

I know where I know where no where to runaway

She falls apart, no one there

Hold her hand, it seems to disappear

Falls apart, might as well

Day is long and nothing is wasted

Runaway runaway [Rodney background:] runaway runaway

[Rodney:] Want

Hold (Want) hold you but your going away

Runaway runaway [Rodney background:] runaway runaway

[Rodney:] Want

Hold (Want) you tomorrow but your leaving today

Runaway Runaway

Hold (Want) hold you (Want) but your going away

But your leaving today, but your leaving today

Derringer Meryl [She Falls apart] Out