Undone

I have FINALLY gotten to Feb 2004, which is when I met Scott. Some people might say “Oh that’s that means more smooshie posts” and really I”m saying “YAY! Finally the disgustingly smooshie posts i’m writing are about Scott, and not some boy that I don’t remember his name!”

This weekend we’re going to Boo at the Zoo (YAY!) which will be simultaneously Katie’s first trip to the zoo and her first trick or treating expedition. So it’ll be awesome. I think i’ll even take our real diaper bag. Make sure she has a change of clothes, I can see her throwing a fit about being in her costume all day.

I’m working on Mandarin’s present still. I doubt I’ll be able to get all of my cohorts together to help me, but hopefully a few of them…. Once i’ve given it to her, I’ll even post a picture or two.

Things are ok with the house. We got new flooring in the entry and hallway. the old flooring was driving Scott crazy. I was much more mellow about it. And he thinks *I* have neurosis. LOL. My car has been acting up. Apparently the electricity connections aren’t running too well (?) and really need to be inspected. It wasn’t a problem prior to the weather changing, but my car has been having problems starting up 🙁 Poor poor car. I sure hope we can get it fixed soon.

I have been increasingly trying to cook dinner instead of us eating out, i think we could save a lot (A LOT) of money if we didn’t just crave eating out all the time. It’s TOO convenient for me to just get something on the way home when I’m tired from work. I feel a really big responsibility to take care of Scott and Katie when I get home, to get the house cleaned up, and  to get a few chores done. I tried to clean last night, Katie was having a hard night. At least (the very least) I swept the laundry room and bagged up the kitty litter (Scott took it out, along with the other trash) it was a good night. we watched How I met your mother (New favorite TV show!!), and Shawna came over trying to figure out her Halloween costume. She’s being a jelly fish.

We had dinner over at Carolyn and Erik’s on Sunday, it was a good time. We played bang, I died really fast (who would have figured) I watched a little Walk the Line which is one of my favorite movies. I enjoyed it, even if it was just the end. 😉 We watched the first episode of How I met your Mother, which was funny 😀 I am in love with that show, and I am very nearly all caught up. I super love NPH, he’s my favorite. Katie hopped into the bath with Alice. Katie’ s a big fan of Baths. LOL, it’s tough being a mom sometimes because I have only 3 hours an evening to give Katie a bath,  cook dinner, watch TV, hang out with Scott (he’s usually sleeping though) This somehow reminds me that I have a monkey quilt in my closet begging to be finished. LOL! it’s hard to fit everything in that we want/need to do!

Saturday Scott wasn’t feeling well, so I did laundry and made Katie and I some mac and cheese. I picked out a couple of movies that she might like to watch (It was between robin hood with animals, or transformers) and Katie chose transformers. I watched Dr. Horrible again (SQUEE!) and watch a bunch of 30 rock (that I had already seen all of) Then we went to the store to pick up some essential items. I made sure we got some immitation vanilla as I had apparently run out. Our goal this weekend had been to unpack, however it didn’t happen 🙁 I got my clothes fairly well organized and folded and put away, however, I don’t really count that as unpacking since most the clothes I unpacked had to go back into a box anyway (I found my box of maternity clothes. yay!)

We took Katie to Home Depot, and she loves it there, mostly because there are so many people and so much space to run. We took her to the christmas area (yes Christmas stuff already!) and she was giddy! She loved the moving lawn decorations, I’m fairly sure I”ll have to break down and buy a little dancing toy that sings Christmas songs. So much more space to decorate. Hopefully I’ll be just as excited later as I am now. 🙂

Off to transfer more old posts 😉

Derringer Meryl [Tis the Season… already] Out

*AHEM* Scott and I were arguing about what Mr. Brandon Flowers was saying in the Killer’s new song “human” and in fact it is as follows “Are we human or are we dancer” For the following reason:

On the band’s official website, the biography section states that Flowers is singing “Are we human, or are we dancer?” and also says that Flowers said the lyrics were inspired by a disparaging comment made by Hunter S. Thompson about how America was raising a generation of dancers.

So HAHAHAHAHA, It is Dancer. Though some people (who are incorrect) have suggested he’s saying “denser” but it’s definately dancer.
and who says that lyrics need to make sense anyway. Some of the most relieving things i’ve ever written have made no sense what so ever.

Sometimes I romantisize about my teen years. i think most everyone does from time to time. I think though the most that i miss is all the opportunities I had. The freedom… was unbelievable.

However… after reading through all my old entries (or at least a years worth) and my horrible puppy dog-ness over several different grown men… It’s nauseating. I won’t edit really… Because honestly it is what it is. I was very honest and real with the things i wrote. I was uninhibited. I miss that the most. Do you know what I find to be more than slightly hillarious though? I’m reading through where one of my ex’s asked me to move in with him ( and NO, not in a romantic sense) and it still feels weird to think about. Even after all these years, and even after marrying and moving in with Scott– the idea of moving in with someone of the opposite sex– is WEIRD. LOL.

anyway. I better get back to transferring over. One year down, six to go!

Today, My Dog died. It sucks. She was pretty sick. I won’t go into the details, simply because… well, it’s really really gross. We got our dogs when I was… *thinks* Around nine I guess? I don’t know. She was in a lot of pain though… so I’m okay with it.

I’ve been really sick the past few days. Saturday until today… I”m still not feeling too great. My ear feels all clogged. my head hurts really bad. My throat is sore, my nose is running like all get out.

I want to sleep, really bad. I woke up at six am this morning. Haven’t gotten more than a half hour at a time since. *sighs* I want to sleep. I want nyquil. I want to drug myself into a sweet slumber.

Alas, there is no more nyquil, or dayquil for that matter. I considered calling mom to bring me some, but I figured that I was married now, and i should just deal with the fact that I have no money right now. *sighs*

My car isnt’ finished. Scott’s dad checked wiht the STUPID mechanic, and he hasn’t even started working on it yet. STUPID guy. I hate him so bad. It’s been over a week, and he hasn’t done jack.

What a jerk.

Derringer Meryl [In Lots of Pain] Out

I think… I think no one really understands what it’s like to be a newly wed until you experience it.

Call me a cocky Teenager, but I thought things would work out better than this for Scott and I.

It’s hard. Being a newlywed is hard. Leaving my old job, is hard. Katy asked today why I was leaving– and I told her, that it was just time for me to go. (Instead of my natural reaction to tell her that she was screwing me over) It is. It’s time to put childish things away. Scott and I are trying to deal with these things as much as we can.

The people haven’t called back about our financing for the car yet. I start my new job in about a week. We have bills, and the threat of Bankruptcy looming over our heads. It feels like this basement sucks us back in every time we try to leave. In the darkness here– I find comfort knowing that God lives, and that I’m going to learn something from this annoyance. I turn my music on, and I listen, hoping to hear something that’s going to inspire me.

Something that’s going to keep me going. Keep me from being even more exhausted than I am at this moment. Someday, the laundry will be done. Someday, The bed will be made. someday, we won’t live here anymore. Someday, i’ll feel better.

Someday, we’ll look at this and laugh.

Someday, things will be okay.

Derringer Meryl [Right?] Out