Undone

MY week isn’t complete until someone tells me what it means to be a mom.

I like to think I’m… OPEN minded, but the truth is, that sometimes the things that the average person says could be mildly offensive.

IMO, and from what I’ve seen, mom’s who put 100% into their kids grow up with bratty kids, and are a husk their former self. Do things that YOU like to once in a while. Your children WONT wither and die if you aren’t watching them every minute. My mom had her hands full with us 5 kids and I don’t think she did a dang thing for herself, other than shower. Does that count? not really! My mom is/was an amazing mom. She was there for me all the time, and loved spending time with me. I loved spending time with her. I also spent time with kids my age and I learned really fast that kids my age were usually just jerks. I would say… 7 times out of 10. Anyway, I liked hanging out with my mom. I remember when I was like… 10 … maybe a little younger I didn’t have any money (because I was 10 and my parents didn’t do the allowance thing. If we wanted money for something we had to work for it.) and I really wanted my mom to get a new shirt. Nothing fancy (though the shirt was pretty IMO that she ended up getting) I just … I wanted MORE for her. I think my mom taught me a great lesson about considering others. I’m not always the best at it… She ended up buying the shirt for herself, but I encouraged her.

As much as I love my mom (and In case you haven’t gotten the point, I DO!) I don’t want to be the mom who doesn’t buy herself a new shirt for 10 years because the kids need school clothes and it doesn’t matter how I look as long as they look good. I’m important too. And for that matter, so Is my mom. I think she’s recovering from the post mom disorder now and takes better care of herself now, but I want to break the cycle. I may not go to the salon all the time, and I dont’ get pedicures, but I want my kids to see that not only am I their mom, I’m a PERSON. I have hobbies, and likes and dislikes. I’m not their servant, I’m HUMAN. I want my kids to know they can rely on me in a pinch, BUT that they should work so they don’t have to.

I love my kids. I love my family.

On the note of my obsession, and such… I was thinking about it this week. As I tend to do (am I obsessed with the fact that I get obsessed?) and I was thinking “i’ve done this forever” My first obsession… I would say Dolls… or reading. I still like dolls, I guess I haven’t outgrown that yet. Reading though. That burned hot and fast, and I would say by 4-5th grade I was bored with it. I still am. On occasion something captures my interest and I will read it, again and again, but usually I just can’t hack it.

Interesting? Eh.

Derringer Meryl [Updates] Out