Undone

Since Scott’s been screaming about it, I should at least blog about it. 🙂 My Claddaugh ring has been flipped (for you Buffy Fans who know what that means) and Scott and I are getting married. 🙂

I was really nervous yesterday (as you can read in my blog about it.) I was also really busy. I wanted to go to the temple and hang out while he was at the other temple thinking and praying about it. I couldn’t because of my classes, and I was stuck on campus while he was in the temple. I went as close as I could to get the spirit though, I went to the institute building. (I had also forgotten to read my scriptures yesterday, so i hit two birds with one stone!) While I was hanging out, I was thinking about things I had learned in my Stress Management class, where we had just so happened to be talking about the power of prayer (I love College, so much better than high School. We can talk about religion!) and how people who were prayed for, and didn’t know it, got healthier faster after surgery.

I’m digressing, yet again.

My teacher said something profound. “Fear is the opposite of faith. If you’re afraid of something you have no faith in it. You can’t live in both places.” So i sat down with my BoM and I was reading and just trying to not plead with God that Scott would get the same answer as me. I finally figured it out though. I had to put my faith in God’s will. Whether it was to be Scott or not, everything would work out okay, just as long as I had faith. it was pretty much all that was in my brain yesterday after I figured that out. 🙂

I also got smacked about the head for continually asking. Apparently God doesn’t like to be asked the same question several times in a row when he’s already given you an answer. *shifty eyes* though I think i already knew that.

Also, in a slightly related topic I just began to cry last night, I was so happy. And I was just… so …excited. I don’t like to cry in front of people, so I basically waited until I was in my room alone and cried. (That has ties back to my childhood. My sibs made fun of me for crying at the drop of a hat. Now I can hold it in until they can’t see me. heh) I just feel so … fortunate. My mom and dad were getting restless with my choice in boys to date. I was getting restless at the flakes I had chosen. No one seemed to understand that I wanted to Marry an LDS boy but I didn’t want that to be the only thing we had in common. (the oh so common pick up line: “I’m LDS, and you’re LDS, and we’re both single…” is the LDS equivalent of “Hey Baby…. How you doin’?”) That drove me crazy. Until now, i could never find anyone who enjoyed the same things I did. I don’t know. Liked video games too much, liked them too little, and so on. I think though, with Scott and I it goes beyond all that. Some of the similar things between us are uncanny. Even between our parents.

My mom keeps reminding me of this, it’s a bit of a quirky story. She always says that I remind her of her mom. So, when her mom met her dad at a dance in Oak something valley (We can’t recall the details exactly of where it was) saw him from across the room. She asked her friends about him, and almost immediately after learning his name said: “I’m gonna marry him.” and so she did. 🙂 The uncanny thing is I was looking at Scott’s profile on LDSsingles (after he had sent me a flirt) and I just read it, and turned to my mom and said: “I’m gonna marry him.” and so i shall. 😉

Derringer Meryl [Uncanny Happy Events] Out