Undone

I worked tonight. It was interesting since I have now had four weeks of quarintene…. or however you spell it. I don’t know

But being there makes me happy and sad all at the same time.

Closing time– one last call for Alcohol…..

I know who I want to take me home–

And i know who I want to take me home… Take me home

Honestly– I don’t know who I want to take me home, what my heart wants– conflicts. Not that it’s anything new– I’ve been in conflict for a while– It’s something I do apparently. So it’s nothing new to me.

I wonder- What life I should choose. One way I wonder if I would really be happy– and another I’m not sure either. But I’m more sure than the first way.

*sigh* But my heart wants what it does. It wants salvation and to cry at God’s Feet, but it wants to be happy with HIM. I’m not sure. Maybe I wouldn’t even BE happy. Maybe I’d just be– be me? Be unhappy. Maybe I’d just end up happy for time, and not eternity?

Maybe I’ll just go delude myself with some fairy tales for a while?

and i know who i want to take me home….

please take me home

Derringer Meryl