Undone

Meryl, what makes your problems so difficult?

They’re mine.

it’s that simple. everything in each one of our lives seems more and more difficult, because it’s us. we have intricate problems, with situations and rules and emotions, that someone else couldn’t possibly understand.

Like my situation with Gert. I’d give anything to be able to tell him how I feel. to be open, and flirty, and just… cute. ya know? I’d love to be able to act the way Artemis does around him, (they’re adorable, but completely platonic) I’d give anything to date him and to see if anything would actually work out between us. To see if I could even make him a better friend. I wish I could do that. But he’s my boss. (to which people say, so what?) that means I work with him on a routine basis. Which also means, the uber uncomfortable-ness of our situation would be extreme, if i said anything along the lines of “I really like you. Do you want to go out sometime?” and him saying “No” (as he is bound to do….) we would all feel, extremely odd, and i would loose my job. and then, nothing at all would be good about my life.

*Frowns*

Well. See, then there are phobias, and just– being neurotic, and wants and desires, and … everything. SO Complicated.

oh. and i’m never EVER ever going back to the mall. I’ll just go to the Software Etc, that’s it.

Derringer Meryl [Pistol Whipped] Out