Undone

Isn’t it horribly amusing when you fall asleep thinking about one guy, and you wake up from a dream you had with another?

right. Well I think it is. I think it shows how undecided i am about the whole “who I like as more than a friend” situation i have going on in my mind.

The one guy i was going to switch jobs for, just so i could date him…. and the other guy, well…. we gave it a go, and he just doesn’t think of me that way. It’s okay I guess, not everyone in the world has to be physically attracted to me. *smirks* (Note: I’m not usually this cocky.) I guess I should move on, but ya know– i’m not the kind of girl who just gives up. I guess it’s what scares people away from me. I’m not normal. I’m not what they want me to be, and that bothers them. From My parents (specifically my dad) to my friends and co-workers. I’m determined to make things work MY way. No matter what. 🙂

Stubborn little byatch, aren’t I?

the thing is right now… which way is my way? I’m not focusing on how i feel, but how everyone else feels about things. It’s so much simpler to say ‘Well Frank feels this way about this thing, so i’ll just do the same.’ There are so few things i feel overwhelmingly like i have to express my opinion, i just go with the flow. 🙂 eh. Works, doesn’t it?

Derringer Meryl [how do YOU feel about that?] Out