Undone

Balance. I demand BALANCE!!

I was at work tonight. Talking to a co-worker friend of mine. Mostly about my relationships, and how apparently the entire state is on crack. I asked the guy I was raving on about in here out on a date. He said no (Of course, what else do you expect from me?) and once again added to the trama that is me. 🙁 Blah.

The whole balance thing. Well my friend was taunting me– about my whole deal with the guy who turned me down, and how i wouldn’t mind even being a controller in his hand, because I’d be near him. My friend of course had to take that all wrong. And THen I started listening to music from this total cutie from another state– he’s romantic and sweet and

Everything I want

Everything I need

Everything Inside of me

That I wish I could be–

but– the thing is, I don’t know. I don’t even know how to say it. I think there needs to be an equal balance of passion and romance. It doesn’t matter how much romance there is, if there isn’t any passion it makes it sap. If all you have is passion and no romance, you might as well be screwing a giggalo. So do you understand? The need for balance.

I’m not against telling someone they are beautiful, or opening doors, or sending flowers– But the passion– the feeling that you can’t breath when you’re around them. That their touch makes you want to die inside– That’s what I need. Both. I guess I’m too demanding.

It’s hard to do that. Find a balance. I’m not sure which I need more. At this point– The passion. The Lack of passion in my life is despicable… as well as completely disgusting. *sighs*

My friend asked me if (very embarrassed he was) I was in need of a good shag. I pled the fifth- I still do. Not because necessarily I do, but I know for a matter of fact I need a little passion. *Pouts*

Derringer Meryl [Music Gets the Best Of Me] Out