Undone

Today– I have to say I feel like Crying. Honest. I normally don’t cry much, but beyond the strain of work (homework, etc) I have the strain of a love that can never be. I suppose-

I can’t remember what it’s called.

Oh Yeah, unrequited. It’s hard. It happens to me a lot though, I’ll muddle through…. 😉 no worries. My Heart will survive the strain.

He’s everything I want. ….. Everything I need– Except he isn’t of the same faith as me, and to some of you who are reading this that isn’t important to you, but it means a lot to me, so I have to let my heart ache-

He’s to cutest guy you’d ever meet. I don’t mean cute like you’d think, like High school girl oozing over how cute a boy is– I mean cute. Like he’s adorable, and I could see myself spending the rest of my life with him. I can’t. I’ll have to remove him from my mind. We’ve became really close from working together– and I can’t say that I don’t dream of him– not just– It’s something beyond a physical thing, cause– he doesn’t like me like that…. I just wish beyond wishing that my birthday that would finally make me legal would be closer.

He makes me feel good, and when I’m around him I don’t care about anything but telling him. And when I’m not near him– he’s all I can think about– all-

I love talking to him, hearing his voice on the other end of the line…. It’s not much. I suppose I just want ot enjoy what I can have. Even if all I can ever do is talk to him, and hang out with him…. I’d be happy. Totally elated– Everytime I’m with him I forget everything else in the world.

I need to push him out of my mind

Derringer Meryl Out