Undone

Well then.

I just spent a good portion of the morning looking for bloody kitty ears… Okay, not BLOODY kitty ears, I mean kitty ears… anyway, it seems impossible to find them when they aren’t hooked to a tale and some other sexy thing, like a bow tie.

Anyway, no SILVER kitty ears seem to exist at the local mall….

Speaking of the mall and such, I went back to my old digs (ie work) and spent a little time talking about my box. *snuggles Box* well, i wasn’t all possessive around HIM, but… I felt odd. Very Odd. Detached, remotely depressed odd. No.. not that kind… I don’t know, new emotion odd.

Like He’s the one person who never promised to give me anything, and gave me lots anyway…. It’s hard to explain, especially without offending somebody, because I have to admit, I have a lot of good people in my life, and I appreciate them, very much, but ….

He never said– never…. He didn’t wanted me to be attached to him, but I became so anyway… It’s… so .. odd, an odd sensation….

And now, I’ve disappointed myself. I remember after my very first boyfriend dumped me I promised myself that i would be cold, and detached (Which I have accomplished for the most part, quite well) and I have to say, i enjoy it. It’s a carefree life, not worrying about others, and …. when I say others I mean, the human race, I dont’ have to worry about them, for the most part, my life is a one person show, that being ME. So… Yeah, I wasn’t extremely attached to everyone there, at work, my old work….. Except him. My old Boss constantly promised me things he never gave me. People usually do that, and dont’ fulfill what they say… and I take it… very seriously…

He never promised me anything, and gave me so much.

The ability to laugh at myself

To feel love, and caring for someone who never did something for me.

THe ability to be myself, and express myself freely

I was able, to be me.

I don’t know if he understands all that I got from our working relationship, but, It was a lot. Enough for me to care about him, he taught me so much…

And for that, he’s endeared to me.

I’m such a sappy freak, and I’m extremely mellow right now, but I can see (as you probably can too) That i am a freak…. and sappy, with the sappiness…. and stuff.

-Anyway-

We finished Buffy (Yippie) and I’m having this sinking feeling that buying an Xbox for one (VERY SHORT) game is a bad Idea. *blinks* Oh well, There is always DOA!

HAHA!

Derringer Meryl [You never sang my song]Out