Undone

I was so nervous about putting up a new entry.

I was afraid he wouldn’t see it, I still dont’ know if he did. Maybe he figured my Journal was private and kept out.

Yeah, right.

*sighs* I might as well say, “Hey, I happened to douse my clothes in gasoline, and this lighter is alittle faulty, want to fix it for me?”

Okay, so that was the lamest little metaphor ever, but I’m not exactly on my game right now. I just… Sorta suck at the talking and not being completely nervous thing.

I just… really don’t want to loose friends. And I’m in the position where I’d consider him a friend. I mean, FETCH, he invited me to a party at his house. None of my …. umm…. okay, some of my friends have, but I mean — he didn’t have to, but did, that’s what made the difference…. and he was probably just doing it to be nice, but…

It made me feel special. Even if my Dad did ruin it.

And I guess that’s what I like about him so much. That doing normal things makes me feel special. Important. We’d just be doing normal store stuff, and when he’d ask me to do stuff….

It was nice. He asked me nice, and it didn’t make me feel stupid.

I didn’t even mind getting his dinner for him cause he asked nice.

Fetch– now you see how far a nice little “Please” can get you. And you know, it makes people have a nice day.

Say Please:

Derringer Meryl [Where there is hatred let me sow love] Out