Dec
08
2003
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Christmas list item number 12

Finals, Are done. Hallelujah…. praise the Lord, Amen. *nods*

Right then, on with the rest of the blog. *nods again* The Mouth and I were reminiscing about our first meeting, how i threw a copy of Herdy Gerdy Across the store and, not only knocked several things off their proper places on the shelves, succeeding in breaking the case quite nicely. He seems to remember assessing me as ‘a quiet, pure, Mormon girl’ and i saw him as ‘a complete jerk off’ (I didn’t tell him that, but it’s the truth…. that is how i saw him. heh.) Yes, most people see me as that. The good church going Ned Flanders would marry me if i weren’t so young, pure as the driven snow (before acid snow was around), white little lamb. Yeah, i guess that’s how i come off, and dang it, i sure do use it to my advantage.

The unfortunate thing is, i have a bit of a sailor’s mouth. After three years of public high school, you get a mouth like that. Actually, that’s a lame cop out. There’s a lot of kids in this great state of mine who come out of school just as pure as they entered it. What i really mean is After trying to FIT IN for three years at a public high school, you get a mouth like that. I admit, i bent to the pressure. It’s not drugs, it’s not drinking, and i don’t do it cept when i’m angry. Bad habit. I’m trying to quit. Honest. *shrugs*

Geek Check. I”m getting this tomorrow, it makes me all kinds of happy and giddy. *nods* Then i get to idle my birthday and Christmas times away by watching the episodes until my brains fall out. *nods* It makes me happy. *dances* YEs, my complete Buffiness, will soon happen. They release about two a year (or so) episodes. So one in July (or so, it might get bumped a bit) that’s the sixth season, and another in December, the seventh season, and POOF they’re done. Happies. :) This is the last season on the WB, who were fools to give SMG and the rest of the crew, the boot. Joss was clever, to give it an ending that would have been fitting if the show hadn’t gotten picked up by UPN…. a fitting way for Buffy to die, but i’m sure everyone else is much happier with her alive the way she is– tho…. people were pretty pissed about Spike… People being me.

Right. He’s semi-alive now. Just as alive as he was before. *nods* Corporeal. Neat. eh?

Derringer Meryl [All I want is a Corporeal Spike] Out

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Oct
08
2003
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You don’t really mean it–

I did it. I finally sent my name into WCI, that is, The Western Culinary Institute. Part of me, despises the idea. I guess that’s why i was so hesitant– because Cooking (with flames and all) doesn’t float my boat. I want to shove some cookies in the oven, and call it good.

anyway, angel– good… must go watch

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Jul
22
2003
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High Notes, low notes

So, I’m giddy happy girl. Sure, I admit… I’m the one woman homage to the exorcist (as seen on How to Loose a Guy in 10 Days) But you wanna know what… People still like me that way. And yeah– it may take a while to find a guy who can stand that, but i think it’s worth the wait.

Always late, but worth the wait.

And I found (thanks to my darling brother) a picture of next season’s Angel Promo. Ohhh does it make me melt. People like James Marsters are so friggin’ hot, it’s a wonder they exist. Ohhhh *sighs*

Lets see, what else? Well according to my good friend Marco (ohhh How I adore the Marco…. let me count the ways) He says he agrees with Red, I look better than my old boss (who coincidentally could also be called red… hm.) and that my thighs and butt are excellent. So I’m smily and giddy from that whole smeal. I mean, who couldn’t love being complimented by a guy. Sure, He’s married and what not, but all together… it’s still a stellar compliment.

I enjoy stellar compliments. They’re fun. However amid the upper of that, I stumble across the thought of not being as pretty as some other girls.

that’s like the stab in the back or something. You aren’t expecting the thought to sneak up on you, in fact– you’re planning on feeling damn special for the rest of the day, and whammo! all the sudden you start to feel really cruddy, because you don’t have the looks of some other chick. *grumbles* I hate that. blah. I mean, i don’t expect to look like Angelina Jolie. Hell. That’d take some damn good plastic surgery. I mean, those regular looking but still stunning girls. THey aren’re famous, but you know it’s still a matter of time until they’re discovered. and it makes me want B&J really bad–

but instead i”m going to the school and doing laps…. in the pool… because out of the two, laps’ll get me looking pretty faster…

Derringer Meryl [unless you enjoy the pudgy look] Out

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Jun
24
2003
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Decisions Decisions….

Right– so I have choices to make, and a very limited amount of time to make them in.

I could stay home for the possibility of hanging out with Monkey, and some Buffy-age

-OR-

I could go out with my debate friends, eat some Pasta at the crazy spaghetti factory, and just– live my glory days (or what ever you might call them) all over again.

Both sound fun. Both are good for me. Both are social outings in which I could possibly escape my family. Red will be at the dinner, and …. well it sounds like a good idea to go and hang out with her for a while. Maybe I can hang out with Monkey, after? All I know is that I am seriously dilemma-ing.

Blah. *sighs*

I guess I’ll go get free food, and hang with some of the gang (after all, it wouldn’t be fitting if the matriarch didn’t show up to her family dinner)

*sighs* Stupid….. Grr and the Argh.

Derringer Meryl [Pouting too much] out

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Jun
19
2003
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All of them – – – -Completely Insane

I’ll never understand the thought pattern of my parents. Sure, someday I will, or at least hope to be, a parent. But I don’t get my parents.

So I’m semi-like seeing this guy. I’m not sure what it is, and right now, i’m just enjoying the fun and the being swept away by the warm fuzzies. It’s what I do. I’ve never been in a relationship (friends or otherwise) where I can be so relaxed that I just enjoy everything for face value. I don’t analyze everything to death and back…. I’m just– me. And It’s nice, with the sweeping and the light flirtatious-ness. It’s very, refreshing since I’ve just came out of a very serious relationship (See, High School, re: the hatred of) and it’s nice. It’s uber nice.

then I get all these heavy feelings. My mom and dad are all captain disapproval (of what i’m not sure) I’m not even sure if they disapprove, or if their just captain bring down. I’m just going a little insane while i’m keeping it light with him, my parents are all “He’s not active and blah blah blah.” Yeah, so it matters to me, but right now, I’m not wanting to think about it.

I don’t know how to explain it, and it’s really crazy since this is me, and what not, but i’m not planning a marriage, i’m living in the now for once in my FRIGGIN’ life, and enjoying it. I’m enjoying every bit of it. I’m thinking about how nice it feels to cuddle, and not how to plan my wedding reception.

And they keep hounding me, and i’m beginning to become annoyed. *laughs* we were watching BUffy when my mom came in and tapped her watch (it was 12:12am) and he leans over and says “You really need to move out.” To which I heartily agreed. Unfortunately, I need to find myself a better job first *le sigh* I nearly left my family at the movie theater to get home and talk to him–

now i’m too chicken to pick up the phone, dial and talk.

Congrats, you’ve met someone more psycho and paranoid than yourself!

Derringer Meryl [Everybody’s coming to] Out

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